Best Wishes for 2009

My goodness, I just made a little collage to recap the year, and am feeling quite nostalgic for 2008. Poor 08 is going to be remembered as a real speculum poke of a year, but we had a pretty good run personally. A couple big firsts, a few nice trips, a beautiful fall, a new president I'm happy about...things are good. You can tell I've been free to move around town this week, my darkling outlook is banished for now. Honestly, out the back windows you can't see any snow at all! Life is good!
Seriously though, if you haven't already, take a few moments and take a look back at the year. Little things I didn't remember kept springing to mind. That's the whole point of all this isn't it? The blogging, the photos, the scrapbooks. To remember the little things that would otherwise be lost in the shadow of European travel, presidential elections, starting school and birthdays. I keep a wall calendar that I jot a note about the day in the square of each date. Not only am I way obsessed with weird things apparently, but I have a really lovely life. I'm happy and grateful and fulfilled. I hope you all can say the same, or if you can't, you're able to look at the obstacles to that and decide if they are hills worth dying on, or, if they are, you are able to find solutions to them. I'm only making the one resolution this year...to try and live a less consumer-y life. I'm convinced we are doing irrevocable harm for no reason outside of minor convenience and bad habit. Not only to the environment, which is truly gonna suck when we wake up and realize we've blown our one shot, but also to the community that shares it with us. I don't want to raise stupid, bovine people any more. Let's raise thinkers. Let's raise aware, analytical, logical citizens from now on. Ok? Good. That's agreed.
Happy everything in 2009 public. I hope the best of everything is out there for you this year!

A Christmas Miracle!

Oh I kiss the sweet, wet, soggy ground! Bless you, dear darling Pacific Northwest! Welcome back. I was suddenly shocked to realize the total white noise I was hearing, because I hear it so often that it doesn't even register, was rain pounding on my roof. Not the accursed soft drift of snow. Glorious, wet, washing clean, rivuleting, snow destroying, warmer than 32 degrees rain! I may drive my car at some point in the future! I had given it up for lost. Oh thank you thank you thank you! Thank you Jebus!

I hope all of you had as lovely a time as did we the past couple of days. Even being trapped in the house wasn't bad. True was in heaven having mom AND dad at her beck and call. She had a perfectly lovely Christmas I think. As per tradition, she got to open one gift on Christmas Eve. The one she picked was the greatest. A while ago we made a big piece of whiteboard for her and we draw gameboards on it. She gets to make up the rules and the spaces and stuff. She loves it. So Daddy made a rockin awesome box for her to keep stuff in. It has a big whiteboard spinner for the lid and he filled the sections inside with blank cards, dice, little animals for pawns, set pieces...How cool is this guy? She was so excited! When she woke on Christmas morning, she got to open her stocking and then we had a wonderful breakfast of homemade pecan waffles and I kid you not, from-scratch caramel sauce. Huh? Trap me indoors and I become freakin Betty Crocker! She played with her new game box for a while, dad and I got showers in, then the present opening began! Honestly, for how much we tried to instill a "we don't need stuff" instinct, the chick got a ton of swag. Good times, though. As the pop put it, "She's only five once." He makes her a gift every year, and this year it had a theme. She got the game box, and after all the presents were unwrapped, in the tree she found a rolled parchment "For Emma, from the Pirates." It was this wonderfully drawn, aged, burned edge, rolled with a ribbon treasure map leading her to her room where she found her new treasure chest. Ok, toybox. Still. She was so giggly following the clues; the mountain that looked like stairs up one side was my particular favorite. It was a ton of fun. The rest of the day was spent playing and lounging and listening to music and watching the dratted snow beautifully blanket the outside. For dinner we made pizza, True now having a real taste for yeast doughs. She can't get enough of the texture and the smell and the fact that it rises. She loves it. The second shot is daddy and I both trying to catch for posterity her throwing it up in the air on her fists. We were laughing so hard neither of us got a usable picture at all. The last shot is the centerpiece she crafted for the "fancy family dinner" out of the Floam she got for a gift. Nice huh?

So the day after was spent much the same, with her pleading for pizza for dinner again, to no avail. I was thrilled to get an external hard drive for my gift and spent the entire day cataloging, organizing and saving all my digital crap. And holy crap do I have a lot of it! But it is now all safely, securely, neatly, off my computer. Whoo hoo!

So while most of us enjoy the season of brotherhood and community, the RNC was busy hatemongering. My goodness, have you seen this? I was shocked at how blatant this is. I can't believe it. Check out hater to see what CNN says about it. Apparently this guy sent CDs to all his crony pals and says, "What? It's a joke. Can't you take a joke?" For the love of mice, the title of the sucker is "We Hate the USA." Why would one political party choose to make this their rallying cry? How out of ideas do you have to be for your entire platform to consist of "the other guy hates your country?" It's all these songs making fun of liberals, which is fine, go to town. But why use that angle on it? Who does that help? They are song parodies about John Edwards, Wright, immigrants and, the capper, that made it national news, "Barack the Magic Negro." I am not making this up. If you can still say you are republican in public, you have bigger balls than I do. Use your voice, tell your party you are tired of their shit and take back your integrity! GO NOW!

Last thing. Last night, while putting True to bed, we talked about how much vacation was left and she says, "I don't want to go back to school. I don't like it." We talked about it, discussed why, what she doesn't like all the stuff we always do. One cute point, she was saying how all they ever do is sit down, they just "sit sit sit and listen." I said, "Well, honey, she has a lot of important things to tell you about." She goes, "Well, why can't she tell us while we're doing art?" Heh heh. So we talked about having free choice every day and it sounds like her biggest problem is that she doesn't have a relationship like she had at the CDC and doesn't feel secure. She has a few friends she hangs out with most of the time but not always, and she doesn't understand how the other kids interact. She says "They only want to do their way. I say, 'Let's do both ways together' but they won't." Or she says they won't take turns. She has had this skillset banged into her about how you act in group of children and the others don't follow those rules. She doesn't know how to cope. I certainly don't want her to say, You've been hogging that game the whole time, let someone else play! but I don't know what to tell her to do. I don't want her to tell the teacher, but I don't know how to teach her to fix it herself. In my room, I always watched out for those little conflicts because I wanted to head them off before kids learned to tattle, but I don't know how her teacher's way of handling it. I'm not blaming, if a kid is really struggling, but is quiet about it, it's hard to pick up on. The noisy ones take so much of your attention! We did some role playing and brain-storming and in the end she said, "Mom, will you talk to her about it please?" Oh dear. Poor sweet thing. I just hate to think of her not wanting to be there, and having to grit her teeth every single day and "face" another school day instead of being so glad to be there. dammit!

La patisserie

I did it. We made two lovely french baguettes today. The miracle is that I haven't eaten them both. They are magnifique! True loved working the dough, and wanted to keep playing with it. She liked the texture. Me too. And the smell. You're lucky we aren't sharing with any y'all as she kept pressing it almost to her face and pulling huge lungfulls of yeasty essence in. I don't guarantee there ain't a touch of Trueby in there.

A friend sent me this picture in an email a few days ago. I was so struck by how different our kitchen is! I took another shot from the same place to compare, check this out. And look at True! She's as tall as the little platform her dad built for her at one. That was funny too. It was so she could help in the kitchen without me always being worried she'd topple off a chair. Notice the wheels on the bottom. That sucker was aces!

Again, totally off topic, but what the hell is the deal with the "liberal" media? After eight years of no coverage whatsoever on the most secretive and criminal administration ever, they are now falling over themselves trying to be "investigative reporters" about a connection between Blagojevich and Obama. For crying out loud!

Alright, if you, like me, are trapped in the house and need something to kill time, try out any of these. This one is rockin awesome, the commentary is as funny as the pics. This one is high-larious and just feels good, especially his face when you kak him. This one is more traditional holiday, but interesting nonetheless. Yep, good stuff.

A Bowl of Red

Oh my god, kill me now. I have been reduced to documenting my cooking. And not fancy cooking. Chili my friends. A little backstory. We usually only make chili for company, because come on, a pot of it feeds 60 people for a month. However, a few years ago I was so unwise as to break either the crock or the pot, what...you don't know which it is either...of a CrockPot my mom gave me. We just got a new one, for 20 bucks, baby! a little while ago and I've been pining to CrockPot something. So, being trapped in the house for days on end, and it being a regular Jack Frost theme park outside, chili seemed a good idea. You always have the stuff, right? And if you don't, you substitute. This has led, at my house as well as your own, I'm sure, to pots of chili that make heavenly choruses sing from on high. And one time, when we still used meat, I swear I stumbled on Nalley's recipe. I kid you not, it would be impossible in a blind taste test to tell them apart. This has also led to chili disasters of course. I once tossed an entire pot it was so bad. Absolutely irretrievable. And we swore to never use whatever we had used that biffed it up so badly. Ask me what it was. I don't remember. I'll let you know when it seems like a good idea again and I toss a whole pot and think, "Oh yeah." So here's what it entailed today.
That huge steaming pot of onions, shallot and garlic is my absolute favorite part of the entire enterprise. Followed closely by True keeping herself busy by dancing with the Wii. That is some funny stuff, if you ever get a chance to see it. Also, interesting (not really) anecdote...I am physically incapable of eating cornbread. Really. It's one of my gag-reflex foods. I honestly cannot get it down. So at a friend's house once, I steeled my gullet to force down the proffered corn bread out of dread of offending, and surprise! It was like cake! No problem at all. Turns out this one brand of mix is the only, and I do mean only, kind my body won't reject. Violently. And it's great with chili! Woo hoo! So tomorrow, I think I'm going to make bread. Just kill me now.

Stir Crazy

Captains Log. Stardate 12.19.08. We have been trapped in the house for three straight days now. Supplies are running low and tempers are short. Entertainment is hitting an all-time low as video is taken of various crew members doing ridiculous things that are funny at first, but upon watching, are simply sad. However, Lt. True has impressed the captain with her literary skills. Her class is given little readers to take home and read at their own pace, exchanging the books when they are competent with reading them. Ok, they memorize them. But the first time or two is genuine reading. Lt. True is on book 6 after just two weeks and is quite honestly blazing through the suckers. Perhaps because they are mind-numbingly boring and she just wants to get it over with. Her reasons are her own. Here is documentation.

Cool, huh? Especially the poor posture and belly exposure. Not to mention bad lighting and grainy video. Really gives it a "reality" look, yeah?

So yesterday I made a break for it. We were running out of food and I was actually going nuts, so I made the hike down the hill to the mailboxes and the little store. It's a little over 5 miles round trip and I can't tell you the carnage I witnessed! There were more cars off the road than I've ever seen. I think people were having my same problem and just HAD to get out. Not good. The bad part was there was hardly ever just one car in the ditch. It almost always had two or three plowed into it. The corners are just hellish. Today, all the hills are closed. ALL of them! Look at the pile-up on our table on the deck. There is so much snow out here! I think I can see Russia from my house! I tried desperately, and ineffectively, to get shots of the sky for you, public. Couldn't do it. My eye far outreaches my photography talent. It was this gorgeous seashell rainbow, with down at the horizon the heavy gray of snowstorm clouds, then a layer of pastel pink sunset tinged cloud, and at the very top, a baby blue sky, pretending for all the world it was a spring morning and it had no idea what was going on below. When I came up the last hill, there was an amber pink pool of light on the snow from the sky. I couldn't even come close to capturing it, though I did manage a little better snow shots by wiggling with my exposure. I'm learning to take pictures by trial and error. There is probably a system for everything I do that takes a third the time and 1/1000 the tries to get the shot I try to get. Most of my pretty ones are total accidents! Dude, that hike back up sucked rocks. It was so slick, every other step my boot would slide backward so you couldn't push off with your feet, it was this weird flat-footed climb that took forever and I almost stroked out. Bleah!

If any of you are out there still dithering if climate change is a myth or not...bite me!

Bring the funny

Honestly, how many things do you know that were funny 30 years ago and are still funny now? Here is one of the very very very few.

Monty Python - Airplane Pilots - watch more funny videos

Funny is my top spot. I love funny. Today, I'm looking at another day housebound, and I would LOVE to have the Monty Python collection to just spool throughout the day. It's one of those things that is A) just plain hilarious all the time, and B) nostalgic for me because it was a big deal with the crowd I ran with in high school...we had "watching parties" before there were DVDs or Tivo. If someone found out PBS was going to run some we hustled to get everyone together and it was like harmonic convergence for us. A total, unexpected windfall from heaven.
So why, you may ask, am I waxing nostalgic about the 30 year old work of five British geniuses and their American friend, though I never really got the animations, too violent for me, Terry Gilliam is a mega-talented director. Ooee, ignore that last grammatical quagmire. Well, outside of it being the wee hours of the morning when I've been up all night stressing about whether or not I'll be able to go to work today and how my kids were so glad I was there yesterday and they were so sweet about missing me on Monday...yet another good thing about the switching classes thing: I have not 25 but 75 kids saying nice things to me at once. Lovely. Anyway....I just finished listening to Michael Palin's audiobook of his diaries during the Python years. What a gig. This guy is having the world thrown at his head, being told on a daily basis that he is the greatest thing walking the planet except for maybe John Cleese, and he writes about how he almost cried when he came home after shooting for so long and saw his 3-year old son "cleaning his teeth with no trouser bottoms on. I just missed them so much." He is, hands down, my favorite Python. Have you seen his travel shows? They're called things like Michael Palin Pole to Pole. He just goes out into the world. I love it. Ewan McGregor and his buddy Charlie Boorman have two series (Long Way Round and Long Way Down) where they document their motorcycle trips around the globe and top to bottom. They're good to watch because Ewan is flipping gorgeous and they're both really funny. But Michael Palin's stuff is funny and makes me want to leap from the house and into the world. It ignites wanderlust. Well, maybe not lust, since I've never done anything about it, but a definite single eyebrow raise and a "hmmmm." Do that yourself right now and you'll know what I mean.
Monty Python is all over YouTube and the net. If you haven't seen any for a while, treat yourself to a couple sketches. You'll be quoting and giggling all day...I guarantee!

Winter Bummerland

Yeah, that's right. That IS the street in front of my house. Or rather, the ice-rink in front of my house. You'll notice I'm posting at noon on Monday. Would I rather be at work right now? Hmmmm, I have one week before break, a test scheduled on Wednesday, three projects unfinished, 75 kids in the grips of Vacation Crazy...nah. Trapped in my house is way better. I'm not stressed AT ALL! Aaargh! Honest to Frank, I'm ready to walk to work!!
Tempering that ulcer-inducing cabin fever is the grin on my kid's face when she goes thundering past on a skim of plastic over a sheet of ice. Check this out:

The part that is amazing...did you see how long that run is? I kid you not, that is 50 seconds of flying. How the shite am I ever going to get to work? It's negative two right now with wind chill. NEGATIVE TWO!! That ain't ice melting temperature my friends. Sweet crap in a basket. I'm screwed!

Sing it Sister!

Day-um we liberals are funny mo-fos.

"Prop 8 - The Musical" starring Jack Black, John C. Reilly, and many more... by Jack Black

Guess what I did yesterday? I took 75 ten-year olds to downtown Seattle to sit through a two hour ballet. Stupid? You'd think so wouldn't you. But this is such a great trip! Ok, there was a ton of help, really, a ton! Parents love this trip. But the kids adore being in the big city, and the PNB's Nutcracker is cool-looking enough to even overcome fifth-grade boys' opinions of no dialogue poncy dancing. This is my third time going and I enjoyed it the most this time. The first was all so new and I was really nervous with all the kids. The second dragged for me, but this time it just flew. I saw things I hadn't before, and was really taken by the beauty of it.I was beat tired too. The night before we had dinner with the girl's two best friends. This is picture is of them shopping in the living room. Get this. Is it possible for a shot to more completely capture these three? You have the one in the princess get-up, which she came downstairs in IMMEDIATELEY upon arrival to the house. Then there's the cutie with the glasses on the head, she was a little more surreal customer. Last, True. All business. When you play shopping, you shop for crying out loud. By the book!

Let me close with this shot.

Remember a little while ago I took that picture of White Horse Mountain? Which, incidentally, someone thinks is not White Horse Mountain. You'll never know! Anyway, this is the same place. The mountains are behind that huge cloud bank. As was the moon. I'm driving along, and from out behind that little arm of cloud, this gigantic round ball just hove into view. Seriously, do not drive near me. I am not safe.

Oh my word!

You have to help me out here. I don't know if this is as funny as I think it is, or if I just burst my spleen because I think Simon Pegg is currently the funniest man on the planet. He did a movie a while ago, Run Fatboy Run. Cute. Not spectacular, but funny. Especially if you are working through a very serious crush. This is from the press junket, some dude crashed, "on behalf of fatboys everywhere" and Simon and David Schwimmer, who directed, seriously seem unable to tell if he's for real or not. Now granted, they are actors by profession, but I seriously think they don't know what the hell is going on! I LOVE random humor. If I were in the middle of 14 hours of answering the exact same questions ad infinitum, I would pray for some crazy running fatboy to shake my tree! Their reactions as they try desperately not to offend while clearly not wanting to be suckered...gold, baby

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Wanna see somethin cool?

Have your eyes been drawn upward over the last week? We've had these crazy cool deep blue skies at sunset, with vivid purple and magenta horizons. Then a high beam bright crescent moon shining in crisp glory. For a while, right next to the white slice of lunar brilliance, these two spotlights of glimmer. Jupiter and Venus have been making themselves known around these parts a bit. The first time I saw it, I thought it had to be satellites or something like that, they were that bright. And huddled right close together. It's one of those things that just screams out what is whizzing and flaring and, most awe-inspiring to me, floating in massive silent vastness just out of sight. I adore the night sky. It's one of the shiver inducing, perspective jarring, "Wake up!!!" things I can never get enough of. Love it. Unfortunately, the light show is almost over, sinking below our horizon, separating from each other until another meeting in the night three years from now. Not even a blink in the time tables of these two.

As exciting to my girl, the tree is up! Let the festivities begin. We've had the ritual live sacrifice to the altar of shopping on Wal-Mart's doorstep, holiday sales are reportedly up despite the brutal economy...let's do this thing!

Ok, you know how I'm so crazy busy doing report cards? Well, I took a little break.

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Little late, but really grateful

Ok, I'm a little late with this one. I haven't been online in two days and it feels like a decade! Weird. Anyway....

We had a lovely holiday. I am embarrassingly overendowed with good things. My family, my friends, my job...I'm really glad to be where I am. It was nice to be able to share that with my daughter, who is starting to realize what I'm talking about. She made some really cute "thankful fors" too. The first one was "I am thankful Jesus loves me." I very nearly abandoned the whole enterprise right there!

But we had a great day, all working together to make a wonderful meal, set a beautiful table with wedding crystal and the gorgeous Wedgwood china from my dadii. On a hideous tablecloth, but what are you going to do?

And of course, the topper, the turtle centerpeice. Tradition, with an edge. Or a shell. Whatever.So you gotta know...we are so very grateful for all y'all. We don't have a ton of "stuff," but we've got piles and piles of what counts. Happy Thanksgiving and the best of everything in the year to come!

growing up

We had a little tiff about her having to pick up her room this morning. So afterward, I come around the corner into the living room and there's this little couch cushion fort with this sign taped to it:

"I want to be alone please"

Oh I love my kid! Even when she's a pill she makes me laugh!

dude

Ok, I don't wanna pile on or anything....but for god's sake what the hell? I won't post it here, because honest to francis it makes me ralphy, but have you seen Palin's video where she's pardoning the turkey? Not a big deal really, but then, she steps over and gives this rambling interview while in the background, the farmer guy is slaughtering turkeys!! It's so awful...I swear as the words, "They'll probably find something to criticize me about with this, but at least it was fun," come out of her mouth, some blood spattered guy in the background has a bird with its head down some kind of funnel thing while it kicks and thrashes around. It looks like it kills it and drains the blood out. But it's a big metal funnel and it's all making a banging noise in the background and I just about puked. Granted, I have a really, ok REALLY low tolerance for that kind of thing. But google it and watch and tell me I'm wrong. How honest to fuck clueless can this chick and her handlers be?
On to more pleasant news. So whaddaya think of Hillary for Condi's job? Honestly, I feel like that chick is such a powerhouse, she can only do a good job. I know she gets kicked around a lot, and while I admire the living hell out of her, I don't know that I particularly like her, but I think she doesn't get anywhere near the credit for sheer grit she deserves. She'll secretary the crap out of the state! Also, my faith in humanity has been somewhat restored with Stevens' losing his re-election bid for Alaska senator. I read that had he been re-elected, he would have been the first felon elected to the senate. Awesome. I'm still pissed that it was close at all, for fuck's sake! but reason won out in the end. Now for Franken! Go baby go! Although, I'm glad the democrats don't have the 60 person majority to knock out filibusters. I honestly feel Obama is making a real effort to have everyone work together, disagree without being disagreeable, and that kind of power doesn't play into that. I think if your idea is a good one, you shouldn't have to force it through anywhere.
Not speaking of this at all...Trueby said one of those weird "insight into her head" things again today. She told me there was a "lady" at school who looks "just like Sharlet," a worker from her old daycare. "But her name isn't Sharlet. It's Mrs. Little. And she knew my name!" Knowing that Sharlet is doing her student-teaching there, I said, "Are you sure it wasn't Sharlet?" "No. They aren't the same." Long pause. "They only are the same that they look the same." Shorter pause. "And they both know me." Short pause. "And they look the same." Me: "But you're sure they aren't the same person." Her:"Mom! I said her name is Mrs. Little!" Me: "All right! So what if you had to call me Mrs. Jones. Would I still be your mom?" Really long pause. Her, in a very small voice: "Please don't turn into Mrs. Jones." Dude! It's what I was talking about before. She is navigating in this world I don't even know exists. Her rules and realities don't even connect to mine. It's so weird. Like calling me a different name would change my personality irrevocably! Ooh, segue. Ok, if you haven't, check out "Interworld" by Neil Gaiman. Or, honestly, anything by him. He is the most amazing writer. I'm in the middle of Interworld right now, and it is sucking me in to the point I was a little late to work today because I had to read some before I got in the shower. On my Kindle I got from my lovely husband for my birthday might I add. Super gift baby! I love to read it while listening to my iPod. I feel very disconnected from everything else. All wired up. Anyway, here he is on a tour reading from his newest book, "The Graveyard Book." I just finished it a bit ago, fantastic! Kind of a spin-off of the Jungle Book with a kid raised in a cemetery by ghosts. Way cool. Follow this link and you can hear the whole book: http://mousecircus.com/videotour.aspx
He also wrote Stardust, one of my new favorite movies. I haven't read the book yet, but bet it's awesome too! I've read a ton of his stuff since finding Stardust a bit ago, he's really incredible. Also, try Terry Pratchet's Discworld series if you haven't. I love funny brit sci-fi.
Speaking of, well, except for the sci-fi, though not entirely...I am totally obsessed with Spaced! I bought it and now get to watch all the DVD extras... woo hoo! It's killing me, I love it. Seriously, you have to try and get hold of it. And no, don't bother asking for mine. Put it in your queue. Although, fair warning, I had it in mine for a good two months before I got it. Reserve your copy today! (Read that in a totally infomercial voice.) And now, because Simon Pegg is Scotty, I have to go watch Star Trek when it comes out. I don't wanna! Well, that isn't entirely true. I didn't wanna. Then I saw a trailer and it actually looks pretty cool. Dang it.
OH YEAH!! Welcome to the world and best of luck to you darling little Craig Knutsen. Fresh and new on November 18. Big brother Adam and mom and dad are so lucky to have you in their lovely little family. I'll see if mom will let me post pictures soon. I'm getting over a cold, but when I'm germ free True and I are gonna photo the bejeebies outta that little cutie!

triptych

So I have three things on my mind right now. The first is this...what the hell is going on with Prop 8 in California? How did that happen? I'm so excited that Trueby will just take it as part of the world that there is a black first family in the white house. It isn't a historic leap forward for her, it just is. I'm hoping we can get the rest of this "us vs. them" out of our systems someday. Take a look at this, from Melissa Ethridge:

Okay. So Prop 8 passed. Alright, I get it. 51% of you think that I am a second class citizen. Alright then. So my wife, uh I mean, roommate? Girlfriend? Special lady friend? You are gonna have to help me here because I am not sure what to call her now. Anyways, she and I are not allowed the same right under the state constitution as any other citizen. Okay, so I am taking that to mean I do not have to pay my state taxes because I am not a full citizen. I mean that would just be wrong, to make someone pay taxes and not give them the same rights, sounds sort of like that taxation without representation thing from the history books.Okay, cool I don't mean to get too personal here but there is a lot I can do with the extra half a million dollars that I will be keeping instead of handing it over to the state of California. Oh, and I am sure Ellen will be a little excited to keep her bazillion bucks that she pays in taxes too. Wow, come to think of it, there are quite a few of us fortunate gay folks that will be having some extra cash this year. What recession? We're gay! I am sure there will be a little box on the tax forms now single, married, divorced, gay, check here if you are gay, yeah, that's not so bad. Of course all of the waiters and hairdressers and UPS workers and gym teachers and such, they won't have to pay their taxes either.Gay people are born everyday. You will never legislate that away.Oh and too bad California, I know you were looking forward to the revenue from all of those extra marriages. I guess you will have to find some other way to get out of the budget trouble you are in.…Really?When did it become okay to legislate morality? I try to envision someone reading that legislation "eliminates the right" and then clicking yes. What goes through their mind? Was it the frightening commercial where the little girl comes home and says, "Hi mom, we learned about gays in class today" and then the mother gets that awful worried look and the scary music plays? Do they not know anyone who is gay? If they do, can they look them in the face and say "I believe you do not deserve the same rights as me"? Do they think that their children will never encounter a gay person? Do they think they will never have to explain the 20% of us who are gay and living and working side by side with all the citizens of California?I got news for them, someday your child is going to come home and ask you what a gay person is. Gay people are born everyday. You will never legislate that away.I know when I grew up gay was a bad word. Homo, lezzie, faggot, dyke. Ignorance and fear ruled the day. There were so many "thems" back then. The blacks, the poor ... you know, "them". Then there was the immigrants. "Them.” Now the them is me.I tell myself to take a breath, okay take another one, one of the thems made it to the top. Obama has been elected president. This crazy fearful insanity will end soon. This great state and this great country of ours will finally come to the understanding that there is no "them". We are one. We are united. What you do to someone else you do to yourself. That "judge not, lest ye yourself be judged" are truthful words and not Christian rhetoric.Today the gay citizenry of this state will pick themselves up and dust themselves off and do what we have been doing for years. We will get back into it. We love this state, we love this country and we are not going to leave it. Even though we could be married in Mass. or Conn, Canada, Holland, Spain and a handful of other countries, this is our home. This is where we work and play and raise our families. We will not rest until we have the full rights of any other citizen. It is that simple, no fearful vote will ever stop us, that is not the American way.Come to think of it, I should get a federal tax break too..

Can't we all just get along? In the spirit of love, look at this. But only if you aren't in public or easily offended


Went to the movies with some gals last night, this is what we saw. Half of it I spent guffawing and the other half with my eyes averted and mouth agape. They really did make a porno...and we watched them do it! It was sweet and funny and filthy! I loved it. Kevin Smith never lets you down, and neither does Seth Rogen. So considering the company, when I say Jason Mewes almost stole the whole show, it's saying something. And bonus...Randall was the camera man! Woo hoo!

On a less derelict note, try this out


Hee hee! I just got season one of the BBC's Spaced with Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright, the comic geniuses behind two of my favorite movies, Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz. Seriously, if you haven't, check these out. The clip above isn't them, Simon is the guy on the bike, but it just makes me giggle. I've added him to my seriously problematically long celebrity crush list. He's in Run Fatboy Run and How to Lose Friends and Alienate People recently, which I haven't seen yet, but so gotta! If you can get hold of Spaced, check it out. It's really funny.
Ok, I gotta go...more Spaced to watch before True is up!

no focus

So one of my friends asked, "What's your deal, now that your guy won you have nothing left to say?" No, no. Just busy. No time to post.

But it's a little weird. I have a ton of stuff in my head, but I don't know what I have to say. I'm not saying I'm outta stuff without the election, but it gave me a start to grease the wheels, you know? I've been too busy to get great pictures to start me off, and have had ugly things in my head with no funny to temper them. I don't know, maybe it's 4 AM and I wish I were able to sleep more.

So, out of gross, into mundane.

Follow this link and see pictures of my girl's class party on the 31st. http://picasaweb.google.com/burnettclan4/MrsMillersHarvestParty#

How about this? Yesterday was specrapular out, so we huddled with buddies and made my girl's favorite treat in the world. I kid you not, it was my 40 year old friend's first time making them! As one of her witty neighbors noted, she just spaces out the good stuff. Why blow it all at once?

Mmmm, good stuff. Lovely to listen to the world howl outside in the dark, and sit inside a warm kitchen while our girls squeal and give silly a run for its money. To bitch and moan to a sympathetic ear about stuff that's making me crazy, and she agree with me on every point. My favorite thing! Except when I'm spoiling for an argument of course. I love having good friends. That's my grateful thing today. And everyday.

perspective

So today I go to work with only this on my mind. I'm excited to talk about it with friends, to celebrate together, to be proud together. To talk to my kids about it. And most of the day did go like that. Before the first bell, my kids from last year were all over the place, making sure I knew. So concerned that I not miss the news. It was so sweet. And I'm so excited that my kids CARE! In each of my three classes we discussed the president-elect, I played the last 5 minutes of his speech for them and told each class how proud I was to be able to say with complete honesty for the first time ever that it was finally true. ANY one of the kids sitting in that room could one day be president. There are no more barriers to anyone who works hard and earns themselves a spot.
Oh, did I mention that the psycho mom is in the room to watch her daughter present her report? Yeah. So after five other kids go, the daughter goes, then the mom takes her and they leave. After class, we're outside and my principal comes out and says, "What did you do?" I was, I swear to heaven, clueless. "NO! What the fuck was her problem??!?!??!?" She doesn't want her daughter in my class anymore. She took her daughter AND her sixth grade son and fled the premises. Apparently she busted into my principal's office, started screaming about how biased I am because I didn't play any of McCain's speech for the kids, and my principal finally got fed up and told her, politely, she was off her nut and she needed to leave me alone. The chick wigged out and took her kids and left. Seriously, to the extent he isn't certain they'll be back. This woman is UNHINGED! It's good to know it's totally her problem and not mine though. I know all along we never think it's us...but then, she doesn't think it's her, so maybe it was me. But I think today proved pretty definitively that it ain't me. So that's good.
I went to pick up my girl and when I get there she is eating a big old milkshake at 5:00 PM. Outside of the whole brainwashing for jesus thing, my only problem with this joint is how they have junk food all the time. Ok, not all the time, but some of the time. And some of the time is too much of the time for me. Anyway...so we're driving home and we talk about dinner and I mention that when she chooses to eat a treat at dinnertime it's her responsibility to eat a good dinner still because...blah blah blah you know the spiel. So she says, "I know mom. But the only choices were homework, and why would I do homework if I don't have any? Whittling, that's too sharp for me (that's another post, funny story. But it was only a choice for 3rd grade and up is what she meant), guns...and we don't choose guns, or the Mississippi Lake (ok, it's River, and it was an activity to fit into their whole theme about traveling across America with the Muddy Mighty Mississippi but it was still a huge cup of ice cream at dinnertime!)" So it got me thinking. She is swamped in all these rules she's trying to negotiate, and she found herself kinda between a rock and a hard place. She KNEW I wouldn't like her to do it, but she didn't feel she could go against the rules at the daycare either. Since one side offered ice cream, that's the side she came down on. It's like a while ago, they decorated these huge sugar cookies and she wanted to eat it in the car. I was all, "Of course not!" and she said, "But they said I could eat it at snack and I didn't because I didn't know if you wanted me to and I really wanted to!" It just made me want to cry. She sees kids all around her all day long, in some cases with adult encouragement, making choices she doesn't think should be made. And for my rules girl, this is so bewildering. She literally does not understand why people don't follow the rules. It throws her all too sea. She is completely off kilter. Of course I'm not saying she does everything perfectly every time. She's five for crying out loud. What I'm saying is that she is very, no really, VERY quick to recognize the wrong choice in others. I feel so bad for her in this world she doesn't have a handle on yet. She gets grenaded for no reason, in her mind. Kinda like with my psycho. I don't understand the rules. When I get penalized, I don't know why! Ok, I'm babbling, but I just was thinking how hard it has been for her, and how I want her to be ok. I guess I'm willing to trade a suck ass kindergarten year for a real shot at a future in a country she can be proud of though.

Born Again American

To quote my girl, "Oh my goo'ness" I am absolutely dumbfounded. I was expecting to be this thrilled, but I was totally unprepared to be this proud to be an American. I cried a little at his acceptance speech. I was moved to be able to believe that we may be able to do this. Maybe we can make America more that a caricature of what we say we are. Maybe it won't be empty words anymore. Is it possible we have given my girl that gift? I am so overwhelmed at the possibility that my daughter may grow up in a country where we are the greatest nation on earth, not because we say we are, but because we actually are. His call that the problems we have to face are bigger than one man, bigger than one party, that we are all in this together and we need to come together and stop looking to blame and start looking to help. Fuck it, I am truly inspired! I want to hang a flag off the deck for the first time in my entire life!

It's not just because he won. It's because of how many people of how many differences voted for him. I'm thrilled he won, but I'm even more thrilled we elected him. A friend of mine is married to a lifelong republican and he voted democrat for the first time ever. It made him a little sick, but he did it. Colin Powell, all the many many republicans who came out to support Obama. It proves that we can see a right and a wrong. We can put aside our differences and see that one thing is right for all of us, regardless of the past. We have proven that our massive country can work together. It makes me believe that we can accomplish great things. We are ready to work and to try and to succeed. I am so fired up! I am so proud of my country!

Let's not even get into the black thing. It chokes me all up. I have a poster up in my classroom that says "Civil Rights" across the top, and is a collage of famous segregation photos. It makes my heart hurt to look at it. And here we are. To all those out there who stood up on camera or in public or to their families or in their hearts and said, "I will not vote for a black man," your time is done. You and your hate have had your time and it is over. I don't feel like I can lay claim to this victory like some people can, but that does not make me any less overjoyed, any less proud, any less exhilerated that our country pulled this off. I wasn't alive when King was leading his fight, but his story has always had a place in my heart. The injustice, the unreasoning unfairness of it has always resonated with me. And the horrifically violent end for a man who wanted only peace has always caused my throat to close up. I am so hopeful that he is able to know what has happened. To share the victory. To lay a huge cosmic "Suck it!" on those hate mongers.So instead of the work being over, it has just started. It is no longer someone else's problem, it's our problem and the solution is up to us. The gross end of the stick when you wrest power unto yourself I guess. So be informed. Be involved. You are the change you are looking for. We did it, now let's do it!

Happy Halloween!

Happy because honestly, there is no other way to describe how my kid felt on Friday. I was able to schedule the morning with no conferences so I could be at her Harvest Party in the morning, she called it doing parent hours. We got dressed up, the best part of which was putting her in the bathtub naked and spraying her hair bright pink. Her traditional trick or treat partners met up with us and we hit around in their neighborhood, made an impressive haul even though Trueby wouldn't go to any of the houses that had dogs. Finally we headed over to meet up with her two best friends in the world to terrorize the joint. While the adults visited and ate, the girls ran screaming through the house for no apparent reason other than they are little girls who love being together. I adored watching her have so much fun, be so at home, feel so comfortable. Literally, she stripped to t-shirt and tights as soon as we got there, and her buddy made it down to only panties! Those two girls are family to her, they've been part of her life every day for as long as she can remember. Luckily, all three moms are a little photo manic, so it's all well documented.
So my friend inspired me to create a new scrapbook this month. I'm going to document one thing I am grateful for every day of November. I'll put some of them here, keep an eye out. While a great time on Halloween doesn't count, since it was October, I am so incredibly grateful my girl has friends like these!

This should fix it

Dear Red States,
We're ticked off at the way you've treated California , and we've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii , Oregon , Washington , Minnesota , Wisconsin , Michigan , Illinois and all of the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California. To sum up briefly: You get Texas , Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research, the tech sector, and the best beaches. We get Nancy Pelosi. You get Sarah Palin. We get the Statue of Liberty. You get WalMart. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America 's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama . We get two-thirds of the tax revenue. You get to make the red states pay their fair share. Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms. Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. We do wish you success in Iraq , and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's Quagmire. With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90 percent of all cheese, 90percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools, plus Stanford, Berkeley, Cal Tech and MIT. With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Baylor, and Dollyworld. We get Hollywood and Yosemite , thank you. Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals than we lefties. By the way, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico . Sincerely, Blue States

I wish I could credit this as due...just thank a witty liberal and call it good

Guess what I did today!

That's right. I did take it down and place it in the box instead of sending it by mail. And not to save a stamp either. There were so many people doing it, too! I don't know if the $5.37 standard postage now is off-putting, or if all of my fellow citizens are equally paranoid. Hell, if my phone is being tapped, who knows what they're doing with my mail! The car in front of me had a McCain/Palin sticker and I thought, "Ha. Cancelled you out, sucker!" The bike behind me was Obama for sure, c'mon...a bicyclist for McCain? I doubt it. So that puts us up by one by my count. Woo hoo!

Almost as exciting as the electoral circus, yesterday we packed up Trueby and met her buddy at the Dream Science Circus. What a hoot! We had a great time. The angle was they take people from the audience, hook them up to the Dream Machine, and their dreams are projected onto the stage. It was great. There were jugglers, acrobats, dancers, funny stuff, wow stuff, little bit risque stuff. The capper was Trueby's buddy getting up on stage and hamming it up to the hilt. Including a bow at the end for her exit! It was priceless. I'm definitely going again next year! Though I don't know if True is so gung ho. She said, "If they put that hat on my head, it would not be good." She wasn't cool with having her dreams sucked out and displayed in the daylight. She is convinced it would be bad news for her dreams to be "out." Yeah, I know.

Check out the photo album for some more shots!

some fun stuff

For the 7% idiot population who are still undecided in this race. Seriously? Should these cranially challenged nitwits even be allowed to vote? Here is a visual representation that may help them make up the uninformed, uninterested, or unable minds they have.

I think this is hysterical. I can't decide which I like better: the steam engine teetering on the very brink of utter calamity, or the dopey face on the Thomas/Palin train. Although, it may be the McCain train that has completely derailed. Don't think so? Check this out


Remind you of anything? Maybe this?

Oh, the good old days.

So, more good stuff. Check out this shot on my morning drive. It doesn't come close to doing it justice, nor does the next from the drive home.

It's the light. I don't have the talent to do it justice, but it is so breathtaking. I want to be very clear..I still hate fall. I hate the death of summer, my dear darling favorite, I hate the onset of winter, my nemesis season, I hate the drizzly, cold, gray, mundane, back to work, death and ending and long long long pull to spring again. I hate fall! But you'd have to be blind and stupid not to see that it's beautiful. I even hated missing pictures when I don't have my camera and got a little point and shoot to keep in my purse always. All these pictures are my workhorse lovely starter camera though, I'm posting its picture too so as not to offend it. And it's my favorite.I'll close with this one. Seriously, if it weren't all eaten at, and god help whatever ate at it, wouldn't it look just like a comic book or fairy tale mushroom? Imagine it all pointy round topped with bright red and light spots and elves dancing around on it. Am I right?