Reason #76509 my kid is awesome

In high school a friend of mine said I reminded her of a quote, that I "keep my jubilee within easy reach." At the time I thought it was a nice way to say I'm an easy audience. It takes absolutely nothing to make me laugh. Today though, I noticed the loveliest thing about my kid. She has a laugh bubbling just below the surface at any given moment and she isn't shy about letting it out. Often something mildly amusing will occur and everyone will maybe nod a little, or the corners of their mouths will curl a tiny bit, but my kid will give an actual laugh. Small, but there. I watch her profile as her cheeks rise and the dimples curve in. Today I noticed she will laugh instead of simply acknowledging something is joyful and it reminded me of what Cathy said our senior year. And I am so delighted to understand what she meant now, and to know that my kid too, keeps her jubilee within easy reach.

Preaching to the Choir

It's often made clear that I married exactly the right guy for me, and totally the wrong guy for me. This morning is a prime example. I woke up with a rant fully formed in my subconscious. I was ready to leap onto a soapbox and preach. I had examples, evidence, analogies, and volume in the hopper. One sentence in I get, "You're preaching to the choir."
Dammit! No argument stopper is more effective than not having an argument. I was hot to discuss the evils of Black Friday. How yes, everyone wants to give their child that magical Christmas morning with piles of packages and overflowing stockings. How we all want to demonstrate to our families that we love them by lavishing them with gifts. But really, I would rather gift my child with an independence from consumerism. I wish for her an economy that isn't split between benefiting the wealthiest top earners at the expense of the entire rest of the country. I want more than anything for her not to live in a nation where capitalist corporations dictate legislation.
I woke up thinking about the Occupy protesters. They have been camping outside, being randomly arrested and pepper sprayed, to make the point that 1% of our national population have acquired an insane majority of the wealth of our country and are abusing the power it has accrued for them. Then, come the day after Thanksgiving, a flood of shoppers rushes into that very system and fortifies it, reinforces it, proves the power that those corporations hold and that they do indeed, have us exactly where they want us. We will grumble about it, but they can do anything the hell they want and we will take it. There are the 1% reaping all the benefit of our system, the 1% trying to change it, and the 98% keeping it running exactly as it always has.
Before I can rage about any of this he pipes in with, "You're preaching to the choir." Really? Yeah, I'm glad we hold this foundational belief in common, but really? You can't let me screech for a while? You know how happy hyperbole makes me.

Acting! Genius!

There are no small roles, only small actors. I think my Trueby may have rocked both today. If you haven't seen a Missoula Children's Theater production yet, get yourself to one. Aces. They roll in on Monday, audition and cast the roles, and Saturday...boomski! A whole freakin play! The Trube loves it, she's been looking forward to this week since early July.

 The play this time was Snow White and my girl (the small actor)  was cast as a skunk (the small role.) Seriously the cutest thing on legs.

  I know my bias is so staggering that I would probably campaign her for a Tony, but really...look at the cheeks! She had a lovely time. They run on and off stage, have a few songs and a couple lines. Love it. There were just under 60 kids and they did two shows. Aunt Jessica and cousin Leila came up to see the matinee which was nutty exciting.

Super fun to watch Leila's eyes grow ginormous with all the weird lighting, costumes and people yelling on stage. She dug it. What a happy baby! Between shows we went to dinner and the kiddo got to explain to all the servers why she was wearing face paint. Added bragging bonus!

 

 So she doesn't get a Tony, but she was totally content with some diva flowers and ice cream at Mallard's afterward. She's a star I tells ya!

Road Rash

She finally let me take a picture! Kinda had to trick her a little bit though. So, Sunday night there was a giant commotion of screaming and crashing and burning rubber...well, not that last, but still. The Trube laid herself out on her bike, face first and skidding on asphalt, and good lord what a mess! Her buddy had been riding behind her and went down in the wreckage but only hit palms and knees. My girl came in so bloody is was like a horror movie. Her lips are all cut up inside, front tooth knocked loose, elbow and knee are literally oozing through the super giant band aids we had to go buy to cover the massive skin grafts. It was so awful! She's still gimping and stiff but recovering. I've been DYING to take pictures but she wasn't having it. She's totally embarrassed that her face looked like ground beef. This is bugging her a lot because today she went to daycamp and she said everyone is going to ask what happened and she'll be embarrassed by all the attention and feel bad. So I suggested we make a T-shirt she can wear to explain it, and that way no one will need to ask. She loved the idea and I got to take a picture of the shirt without her cursing my camera! Win win!

 

I'm Unable to Bash a Squirrel in the Head With a Shovel

This weekend I was helping the Trube get her bike into the basement when we found a squirrel laying in the grass, panting but otherwise motionless. Our cat was poised above it with, I swear, a smirk on his face. There were two largish puncture marks in the squirrel's sides and it clearly couldn't move, I'm assuming it's spine had been snapped. Of course my girl is all sympathy and wants to help but doesn't know how. I'm equally clueless. Worried what she'll think I toss out the possible, though wildly unlikely, scenario that a dog got it, using the size of the holes to add weight to my conjecture. "No, Ringo couldn't make holes that big. His mouth is too small."
"Well, what dog was in our yard, Mom?"
"You know, I bet a dog got it in the woods, and it managed to get away and crawled into our yard." She's skeptical, but let's it pass in favor of the more pressing question, what are we going to do? I go to the basement and get the shovel, but there is just no way I can pull it off. Instead, I cravenly scoop it's totally limp body onto the shovel and tell my sweet kid that we're going to put him in the woods so his family can see him. She's all for it!
I'm sure he isn't suffering, he can't be able to feel anything, and I simply don't have it in me to try and brain him in front of my daughter while he's laying there with his little black eyes staring at me and his sides heaving in and out. It was horrible.
When we went to pick up Gordon for dinner and told him about it, he asked if we'd smacked him in the head and True threw her hands to her mouth in horror and gasped, "NO! Why?!" I explained it to her, but can only imagine if she'd actually seen me try and do it. As it happens, I'm a coward and my kid thinks the squirrel visited with his family before closing his eyes and drifting off to squirrel heaven.

Most Awesome Kid in the Universe

I know you know that I know how great my kid is. But seriously, check this out. So I am completely floored by the magnificence that is Hugh Jackman's Oscar opener. Need a reminder? Here you go.

Right? I know. I often screech the last line when I've been more awesome than usual, or just to annoy my kid since it's hysterical and I love to yell. So the other day, she comes home with this that she made for me.

I cannot express how much I love my rockstar kid.

And now she knows

As is often the case, I have to preface this with a little background. The Trube loves to watch the parts of Glee where Kurt and Blaine sing. She's fascinated with Kurt, thinks he's adorable, and totally digs on the a cappella scene. Who doesn't like singing and dancing? She was naturally curious when Blaine laid a nice sloppy one on Kurt and we had the discussion about what gay means. I told her sometimes boys love boys and sometimes girls love girls. We love people for who they are inside, not what they look like outside. She was totally down with that and we moved on.

So today she was telling me how she's got it all planned out. She's going to marry the boy she first declared her intentions with in kindergarten. I said maybe, but told her she hasn't even met most of the people she's going to know in her life. "One day, you're going to meet a boy you think is so kind, and so smart, and so funny, and so cute. Or maybe a girl." She says, "I don't want to be gay." I asked her why not, and she says, "We would have too many kids! What if I have three kids, and the girl I'm gay with has three kids...that would be six kids!" Oh crap, cogitated I. The moment is upon me. I have put it off for eight years come Tuesday. Every time we come close to the subject, and there have been some mighty close shaves, I distract her with something shiny. But I gotta bite the bullet at some point!

So I did it. I had a little trouble getting started, kinda hedged around how in all plants and animals (I know not ALL but she's in second grade!) there are male and female for a reason, but once I got it going it was ok. When I got to the actual mechanics part, she made the requisite horrified/disbelieving/appalled face and said, "I am NOT doing that." But I got it all in! She's not as well informed as her friend who got the whole skinny, down to genetics, from her health teacher mom in kindergarten, but she's not totally in the dark anymore. I asked her if she had any questions and she goes, "Do you wanna play Monopoly?" Yes, darlin. Yes I do. Now that I've deprived you of your innocence, I will crush you with the racecar.